I love fitness, working out, running, actually anything that means moving my body. Until 2018, I have been such a loner in this. But, God changed me all because of my love for others and my calling to love others!
I typically prefer to be on my own time schedule. I do not like to commit to working out with someone at a certain time. In the past, if people had asked me to do this, the mere thought of it stressed me out and made me anxious. There are very few things that I have set to a time schedule--which, by the way, drives my husband insane! For example, in our homeschool, we never start at the same time, end at the same time, and heaven forbid if we had a time-blocked schedule in 15-30 minute increments. I tried that one time and made a schedule cause I though that's what all homeschoolers *should* do. I didn't even make it through one day!
I typically prefer to be alone when working out--running alone, I can run my own pace. Working out alone, I can chose and do my preferred style and just go with what I'm feeling for that day. Working out with a video, I can push play whenever I want and pause when I want. Also, a gym membership--that is too much time--to drive to a gym and then again, usually you must adhere to a time schedule, and I have already mentioned that is the most difficult part of it all to me. I've come to see that a lot of these things are just flat out selfish, but it's also part of me--even when I'm not being selfish--it's as if you could call me an introvert when it comes to working out, which is so weird because I am very much an extrovert in life. Interestingly enough, my very introverted husband is such a extrovert when it comes to working out. He loves group activities and talks and cheers on people when running triathlons. So strange--is that a thing? If you are an introvert in life, you are extroverted in working out? Extrovert in life, you are introverted in working out? Anyone else ever thought of this?
I'm pretty sure that some of this is just how I am at my core and have always been, and that's okay. Even in middle school and high school, when my love for sports and fitness was just beginning and growing, I loved track and field the most. I think because it was more of an individual sport. Though I was on a team and also did relay races, the individuality of the sport and running your own race was one of my favorite things. I did love volleyball and basketball--I did love being on a team. However, track and field was by far my favorite, and even then I think I knew that I loved it the most because of the individual sport.
But, God, has done a work in my life, showing me that some of it is selfish and showing me that some, thought not all, come from a place of striving and pride. I have also come to see that in the messiest parts of considering others is where I am most blessed. I have come to learn that cheering someone on is one of my favorite things to do. As I went through Revelation Wellness® training, the word I claimed for my journey was OTHERS, and even more, I knew this journey for me was all about loving OTHERS. While I do still pull away and have my own introverted workout time, I am loving being a group fitness instructor. I am loving figuring out how I might bless others through what the Lord has taught me. I am learning that sharing life is so good and refreshing. I am learning that it is such a blessing to give to others and help others. "Others" is my new jam!